When are we going to India???
Here's the deal. Remember that coveted pre-baby pick-up hair appointment I was able to secure with less than two months notice?
Unfortunately...it's not until this weekend.
So there's that, plus the fact that none of our doctors seem to want my germ-infested adult presence around our intubated preemies, lest they catch some type of infection and it hinder their progress.
Welcome to the fast lane of parenthood. What's best for mommy is unfortunately, not always what's best for the babies.
So hard as it may be, I will do my best to hang out for another week and a half or so and then head over, when hopefully, both Scarlett and Hayden will have gotten the hang of this whole breathing thing. Daddy will arrive in May, when hopefully, babies will be released, and we can finally start on Operation Exit India!
We have a new routine now. Every morning at 8:30 a.m. I call Dr. Gupta. It's around 6 p.m. in New Delhi, so he is able to give me a full day's report. Just for fun, I rang and told him this was "Bernadette calling to see how her babies Scarlett and Hayden were doing."
Crickets.
Ok, fine, I'll play by the rules. "I'm calling from the U.S. to see how the boy-girl twins born on Friday morning are doing."
A reaction!
Here goes: Both have three issues. Breathing, blood pressure and passing urine. Scarlett is our champion breather, and we are hoping she will be off the vent soon and onto a C-Pap. She needs to work on her blood pressure and passing urine (although she is improving).
Hayden seems to be content on his vent, although the pressure has been decreased a bit. He is receiving 45% oxygen. He gets a gold star in the blood pressure department for the day though, and will hopefully be off treatment shortly. He, too, is having the urine problem.
I insisted on badgering Dr. Gupta to tell me that they will be ok again but he remains non-committal. Typical male. In return, I made him feel completely uncomfortable as I told him how incredibly grateful we are to him and the centre staff, how amazing they are, how they are real-life angels, how we just LOVE them for doing such an incredible job of looking after our babies, etc., etc., etc.
Perhaps I should start tomorrow by introducing myself as "that crazy American woman."
... betcha he'll know who I am then!
Here's the deal. Remember that coveted pre-baby pick-up hair appointment I was able to secure with less than two months notice?
Unfortunately...it's not until this weekend.
So there's that, plus the fact that none of our doctors seem to want my germ-infested adult presence around our intubated preemies, lest they catch some type of infection and it hinder their progress.
Welcome to the fast lane of parenthood. What's best for mommy is unfortunately, not always what's best for the babies.
So hard as it may be, I will do my best to hang out for another week and a half or so and then head over, when hopefully, both Scarlett and Hayden will have gotten the hang of this whole breathing thing. Daddy will arrive in May, when hopefully, babies will be released, and we can finally start on Operation Exit India!
We have a new routine now. Every morning at 8:30 a.m. I call Dr. Gupta. It's around 6 p.m. in New Delhi, so he is able to give me a full day's report. Just for fun, I rang and told him this was "Bernadette calling to see how her babies Scarlett and Hayden were doing."
Crickets.
Ok, fine, I'll play by the rules. "I'm calling from the U.S. to see how the boy-girl twins born on Friday morning are doing."
A reaction!
Here goes: Both have three issues. Breathing, blood pressure and passing urine. Scarlett is our champion breather, and we are hoping she will be off the vent soon and onto a C-Pap. She needs to work on her blood pressure and passing urine (although she is improving).
Hayden seems to be content on his vent, although the pressure has been decreased a bit. He is receiving 45% oxygen. He gets a gold star in the blood pressure department for the day though, and will hopefully be off treatment shortly. He, too, is having the urine problem.
I insisted on badgering Dr. Gupta to tell me that they will be ok again but he remains non-committal. Typical male. In return, I made him feel completely uncomfortable as I told him how incredibly grateful we are to him and the centre staff, how amazing they are, how they are real-life angels, how we just LOVE them for doing such an incredible job of looking after our babies, etc., etc., etc.
Perhaps I should start tomorrow by introducing myself as "that crazy American woman."
... betcha he'll know who I am then!
You are awesome!! And it totally makes sense to wait to go there. I can't believe there's even more waiting for you guys, gosh, can't wait to see you with your babies safe and sound back at home.
ReplyDeleteI hope the times goes by incredibly fast so you are in India in no time (probably not!). I did laugh at the phone conversations with Dr Gupta but given your babies are probably the only 'American' ones there he would know straight away who you were. Glad to hear babies are going well.
ReplyDeleteWow, ok,seems as though they have a good handle on things but not in the communication dept. as we would like, huh...i've been thinking, praying and checking for your updates & i must say you help ease my nerves by posting!! :)
ReplyDeleteGlad to hear many have left emails for you in the last post to link up or are in Delhi and can try to help..love the support of our surro buddies...all the best, and safe travels. Here's hoping for a speedy recovery and exit.
Ok you're still making us laugh with all that you're dealing with. You are Sooo ready for mommyhood.
ReplyDeleteSounds like they are making good progress. I never thought of the germ issue and that makes so much sense. I'm sure it's tough but we all know how strong you are.
Thoughts are with you. I'll be continuing to press refresh on my phone checking in on you guys.
K
Bernadette & Duane, I have just been reading your posts after emerging from under a rock. Firstly, hugest of congratulations to you both - a family at last!! Secondly, you have been blessed under the most difficult of circumstances but one thing is for sure; their survival instincts are strong, and will continue to grow as they continue to grow. Prayers and thoughts are with you.
ReplyDeleteIt must be soo hard not to be able to see your babies yet! And hard to be away from Duane all that time, once you go. It sounds like the babies are making progress, though, and you've got a little time to get yourself ready for the trip. Looking forward to reading all your updates.
ReplyDeleteI say go whenever you can swing it, go! Be damned the waiting...you've been waiting a lifetime for goodness sake!
ReplyDeleteI had to wait 10 days before I got to hold my children for the same reasons...it was the most surreal/emotionally draining days of my life...it was probably for the best but it'll do wonders for our soul to be in the same time zone!!!
The reality - as you know - is that there is very little you can do until the babies can eat and breath and poop and hold their temp on their own....but why not obsess from the other side of the glass as opposed to the other side of the earth?
However it works out, you'll be on your way in no time. DEEP BREATHS!!!
Even during these crazy times,I think its great that you can still find humour in everything!!I think that is soo great!!On the serious side...I am sure you are going through a very stressful time.We are all behind you,wishing your little ones a healthy and speedy recovery.Looking forward to the day when you can finally hold them in your arms!!
ReplyDeletekathy
Not being able to go to India right now and hold your babies is probably the hardest thing you will ever have to go through as a mom - but you are absolutely right - it is what is best for your babies right now. Hopefully by the time you get there you will be able to hold them and tell them the story about how they were so impatient to see their mom and dad they busted their way out early. Twin power at its finest! Just keep busy and mark off those days till the plane takes off. We are up in Philly sending lots of good thoughts and prayers your way and even more over to India.
ReplyDeleteHello Girl
ReplyDeleteI will be there in May maybe I can meet you two see how you are doing and see how your wonderful kids are doing. I will be ther from May5-10 Let me know I can email you my hotel and stuff we can have a nice dinner or something talk about the process. I hope things are going well If you need me let me know.
Michael
I would be as crazy, if not more, so I'd say you are very sane :-) So glad that they are starting some improvements and that you get to go be with them soon!! I can't wait for your post when you get to meet them. I'm gonna bawl... I already know it :-)
ReplyDeleteI am glad to hear you have regular updates that do not include emails that can be misinterpreted! Who cares if you are the crazy lady, you have every right to be crazy and it will only help your beautiful children. Good luck with the wait here in the US - you are one strong person!!
ReplyDeleteLittle late here. CONGRATULATIONS! Your babies are in the finest of care. This isn't the first time around the block for the doctors. Hold tight, breathe deeply, soon you will both be there and all the love you have been waiting to give will find a home in your little boy and girl.
ReplyDeleteWhile I have never been a religious man, I still have strong faith and our family's prayers and faith go out to you both.
Mike, Mike, Rose and Eva
The most important thing is that they are improving and they both seem like fighters..just like her parents. Hang in there and get there when you can. At least you'll be looking like a hot and sexy mama with the new do! Thoughts and prayers are with all of you. Take care.
ReplyDeleteWow!! I will keep praying for you all. Everything will be ok, i just know it :) keep us updated. Annie-b.
ReplyDeleteX x x
B&D, loads of congratulations on becoming parents! What beautiful babies! Scarlett and Hayden look like the sweetest little darlings in the pictures you posted! Loads of love and hugs to all of you. I'm praying you are with your children soon, and that they get stronger and better and are resting in your arms in a few weeks. Every second seems like an eternity right now, I know. But you've come so far and the cutie pies are here now and they know Mommy and Daddy are so proud of them for being brave. We are all so proud of you, Scarlett and Hayden!! We all love you!!!
ReplyDeleteOnly now at my PC, Congrats!!!!!with the twins!!
ReplyDeleteyou will enjoy every sec!
Firstly thank you for this update, and I am really pleased to hear they are making progress. You have two fighters there. Hope you get to meet your babies very soon. Praying for you all. Y ou really are on an endurance course right now, keep strong xx
ReplyDeleteDear Bernadette and Duanne
ReplyDeleteYes I agree that Dr Gupta seems non committal but I really think that that may be a cultural issue too. As Australians and Americans we expect answers and now but that is not how they operate. We have to learn to bear with that. Dr Gupta is a dedicated clinician. Can I just say that our twins spent three or so weeks in Pitampura and when I rang Dr Gupta from Oz at all hours of the day and night he was not far away. It would appear that he actually owns the hospital. My husband S likes to ask crazy questions. And yes that was one of them. Dr Gupta worked in the state system for a long time and as I understand it became disenchanted and set up his own private hospital. It is really very well run and even though it is different to what you and I and Duanne and S may have expected it is surprisingly efficient and well run. Can I say also that i observed the beautiful nurses and young doctors at work looking over their tiny charges and I thought that they were full of love and tender care for all babies at Pitampura. They administer medicine and nursing care but much love as well. Scarlett and Hayden are in very good hands ; you must believe me. When you arrive, rest first and then at a sensible hour ask Rahul or one of his dear drivers to take you there. It is a long way away from where you will be staying. I am thinking of you every day and sending prayers and positive affirmations to you and to your babies.Lots of love
n
Oh B, you're making me cry. I have been prising like crazy and sending every positive, healing, strengthening vibe i can muster to your beloved little darlings. Congratulations. I wish they had stayed put a bit longer but we've seen this before and it all turned out well, as it will for you. They are in a Level 5 NICU, the best of the best anywhere in the world, each day they will grow and get stronger. You will be with them soon. Lots of love from Meg and Toby xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
ReplyDeleteHi just got close to a computer as last two days mine out of service. So glad to hear babies are doing well - sounds like the dr's are taking very good care of them!!! Their pictures are just beautiful as our their names!!! You will be by their side in no time and they will be getting bigger and stronger by the day!! So happy for you and Duane and praying, praying, and praying for you all!!!!! Lots of love, K and J xxxxx
ReplyDeleteHello .... Crazy american lady, you are doing so well when you are thousands of miles away and communicating by phone and email!!!
ReplyDeleteI found the photo's of scarlett and hayden and they are lovely i did it all backwards!!!
They are being looked after so well and they are top in the field so they will get your babies well for you to hold very soon!!
Chin up chick and keep being crazy as i love your blogs,
Love and best wishes to you all
lisa x
Hang in there Bernadette! While it must be terrible to not lay hands on the babies and watch the every move of their doctors/nurses, hopefully by following their advice everything will move along swiftly and you'll have that happy reunion soon! Enjoy getting your hair done this weekend. I suspect after your return with the kiddos those days are but a memory for a while!
ReplyDeleteHey Bernadette, I just found this poem that a friend with triplets told me about a while back. Thought you might relate like she did. Her babies were in the hospital for about 2 months.
ReplyDeleteMy sweet little ones
You arrived much too early
So tiny so frail,
But perfect in every way.
My sweet little ones
We must live apart for now
You need to keep growing
You live in a womb outside of me now.
I visit everyday only able
To touch you through the glass.
My sweet little ones
I watch you open your eyes
And look all around.
Do you wonder where I am?
Can you see me?
Do you know I'm here?
My sweet little ones
I long to hold you in my arms.
I open the door to touch your hand,
You grasp my finger so strong and firm.
I look into your eyes and
I know you have a strong will to survive.
My sweet little ones
To leave you is the hardest part.
My heart is heavy with joy and sadness.
The tears pour down each time I say goodbye.
The three of us are a part of each other,
And soon we will all be together again.
My sweet little ones
- Tammi Hatch
Oh, I'm so glad you posted that your babes were born on my blog! I admit, I haven't been the greatest about keeping up with other bloggers for the past while.
ReplyDeleteIf you need help/support/advice with ANYTHING, feel free to email me (emkoob at gmail dot com) I'm not anywhere near a NICU know-it-all, but after a month, I feel like I sorta know how things work around here :) Congrats on beautiful babies, and you can do this!
i am so so so incredibly in awe of your strength!
ReplyDeleteand so incredibly excited for you and duane...i can't wait to see and read about you meeting your gorgeous son and daughter <3
makes me tear up just thinking about it!
xoxoxo